My post about reading picture books generated some comments on Facebook about difficulties students have tracking and mixing-up words. Having a child who struggles with reading is never easy. Sometimes you feel like they are on the verge of making a breakthrough—then they get a bad grade or test score and you are right back to square one.
Here are some suggestions. Please know many students have difficulties in school. While these issues are challenging, they can be overcome or altered so life and learning is still enjoyable.
- How long has it been since your child had an eye exam? In our busy lives it is easy to forget our children are growing rapidly. Their eyes can be changing too. Visit a good ophthalmologist and ask them questions about your student’s reading problems.
- Schedule a meeting with your child’s teacher/s. Before the meeting, write down a list of your concerns and questions. Be specific. At the meeting, let the teacher/s speak first. Listen carefully and jot down notes. Don’t interrupt with questions. Wait until you gather all the information. You wish to learn as much as possible about your student’s academic difficulties in school. Even if you disagree, gather all the information you can. After the teacher/s finish speaking, check your notes and ask your questions. Make sure you find out how many breaks from school work your student gets during the day. Ask the teacher what they do specifically to address your child’s reading difficulties.
- If you are unhappy and/or disagree with the teacher/s, keep your cool. You can always contact them later or call another meeting that includes the guidance counselor and/or an administrator. Sometimes it isn’t until you think about what was said that you later realize there might be some truth to the advice. If you disagree, do your homework and backup what you believe. Be respectful but continue to press the teacher and principal to get your child the help they need. Recognize teachers and principals have a lot going on.
- Is there a reading or learning disabilities specialist at the school who can provide consistent support?
- Consider requesting school psychological testing. This will be necessary for No. 4 and should include obtaining discrepancies between IQ and achievement testing. In a lot of places current reforms involve a change in this practice with a focus on Response to Intervention (RTI). I still think discrepancy information is important to know and understand. Whatever scores your child receives should not be seen in a negative light, but it might help you understand your child’s difficulties. Here you should make testing work positively for your child.
- Ask the teacher about outside assistance or tutoring. Sometimes teachers moonlight and will be willing to provide some individual or small group tutoring after school.
- Opt out of the standardized testing that serves only to bring down the teacher and/or the school.
- If you are having trouble obtaining services, learn what your legal rights include. Most school administrators and teachers want to do what is right for children. Be respectful but insistent.
- Get involved in school activities. This is said time and time again, but it really does matter. Try to carve out some time during the week to volunteer at your child’s school. Perhaps you can tutor another child, or assist a teacher in making materials. Consider your own strengths. Do you have hobbies and/or an area of expertise that could help students and teachers? By all means join the PTA and express your concerns about changes to school curriculum etc. Parents who ban together for a common cause are a powerful force!
- Common Core is a separate but important issue. If your child’s difficulties seem to be more about Common Core than reading—join the crowd of parents who agree with you! It’s too bad that a child’s difficulties get all mixed-up with an untested curriculum that has no safety net for student differences. But try, with the help of the teacher, to distinguish what honest learning problems face your child. Then work on those independently from Common Core. If you can, help fight Common Core and high-stakes testing.
- Unfortunately, negative public school reforms aren’t going away soon. While I have great admiration and respect for parents who fight against current draconian reforms, and I believe parents will be the ones to save the day, your children only get this small window of opportunity to learn in school. Find as much outside support as you can if they experience reading difficulties. Make time each day to really enjoy being a parent.
- Try to avoid tutoring your child yourself. When you are close to a situation it can be difficult to work with your own child. But if finances are tough and you must, I suggest you spend some time in the library scanning reading disability books. Patience should become your middle name.
- Don’t forget that everything isn’t all reading and academics. Find your child’s strengths. If you notice they like to draw, visit Michaels or one of the art stores and get them a “How to” drawing book. Explore your child’s interests and use those interests to help them do better in school—or just to have fun. A child should have time every day to explore their hobbies and accomplish something enjoyable of their choosing. Who knows? Someday it might lead to a grand career!
- Engage your child in outside activities if they are interested. Scouts, sports, dancing lessons, plays etc. parents you know the usual outlets—can all give your child an area where they can excel outside of school and build confidence.
- Look for games and magazines that capture your child’s interests. Some games have no education value (other than fun and that’s o.k. too sometimes). But there are many games that address learning and even learning problems. I love the simple memory games where you have to match two or more cards. Whenever you purchase a game, ask yourself how it might help your child learn. Likewise, magazines for reluctant readers are great. Ranger Rick and Lady Bug, Cricket etc. are some of my favorites. Highlights for Children should be in the mailbox of every child with a reading problem. There are dozens of fun activities directed at reading—like finding the hidden items in pictures.
- Find auditory activities to build on visual deficits. Look for taped recordings of stories or digital readers and computer programs where students can read a book while listening to words. Barnes and Noble and other bookstores should carry book/cassette tape kits. Show a student how to track the words of a book with their finger so they will keep their place.
- Be aware of how your child is taking all this in. Children are sponges. They absorb what we parents and teachers say and do. If they believe their problems are hopeless they will shut down. Always share with them what you are doing and let them know their difficulties, while challenging, don’t define who they are as people.
- Find the activities where your child excels. Don’t go overboard with fake praise for every little thing your child does to make up for their difficulties in school. But search for those lovely moments of achievement where your child shines. Frame a work of art. Recognize breakthroughs. Always, let your child know you support them and recognize that it isn’t all about school.
- Don’t blame yourself for your child’s difficulties. Children carry the genes of generations past. Every child has strengths and weaknesses totally unique. Love them. Support them. Do all you can to help them learn, and let them know you will always be there. Then let go.
- Enjoy each day with your child and be proud of their individuality. Many great people have overcome reading problems.
Leave a Reply